I distinctly remember stumbling down some steps outside of Brice and Debbie’s house before I got into the cab just before 5:00 a.m. the next morning.
I also recall sitting in a middle seat on the plane next to a chatty businessman with horrible coffee breath. And, in my mind’s eye, I can still see the flight attendant with the out-of-date beehive hairdo that smiled kindly at me when I got off the plane in Minnesota.
But the rest of the early morning is kind of spotty.
When I landed, I know I took a cab to the address Judy texted me the night before. Judy was glad I was coming, and her reaction made me feel better about the whole thing, too. But I hadn’t had a chance to tell Lou myself. However, I was sure Judy and Dave let him know I was on my way.
I do recall that the cab driver was from Nigeria, and his English was horrible. I assumed I was going back to the hospital where Lou had all of those tests, but as the cab exited the highway, I was positive we were nowhere near the hospital. Panic had just started to set in when the cab entered a roundabout, and I felt certain he didn’t understand how to get where I needed to be. But seconds later, I saw the sign for the Mayo Memorial Building, University of Minnesota Medical Campus.
Whew. This had to be the right place.
I was arriving very late for Lou’s appointment — everything took so much longer than we planned. When I called Lou’s cell phone, it went into voicemail — which wasn’t normal. So I called Judy. She explained that Lou’s appointment started before my plane even landed — which was ironic since it took these doctors longer than expected to actually book Lou’s appointment in the first place! But I was thankful he was meeting with the doctor, even though I wanted to be there with him.
Maybe it was for the best that Lou was alone, I tried to reason. I was a total wreck, and I was sure my emotions had the potential to make things worse, not better. But I couldn’t believe I was back in Minnesota. Every muscle in my body hurt from trying to keep it together. I was wobbly and full of fear, and until I got my eyes on Lou, I was sure I’d continue to be shaky.
I was just paying the cab driver and gathering up my things when Lou called my cell phone. I scrambled to answer it on the second ring. The instant I heard Lou’s voice, I was disoriented and confused. He sounded… Happy. Elated, even.
He said, “Baby, where are you?”
I said, “I’m just getting out of the cab in the circle drive. Where are you? Are you OK?”
He said, “Stay right there — I’m just walking out the front doors.”
Just as I looked toward the entrance, I saw Lou, followed by Judy and Dave.
Lou was clearly crying, but he was also smiling from ear to ear. And, he seemed to be walking with a strut. (What?) When we reached each other, Lou grabbed me in a bear hug, and I could feel his body shaking with emotion.
He said, “I don’t have any cancer, Baby. Just an enlarged and bloody prostate!”
What?
When I pulled away from Lou to look up at his face to see if he was kidding, he looked down on me, and tears of relief started pouring down his face. I wrapped him up in my arms again, and Lou just kept crying as his muffled words about “no cancer cells” filled my ear.
Looking back now, I’m still confused.
Lou was going down the tubes the night before, and now, he was walking out of the Mayo Clinic with no catheter, and news that he was going to be OK? It was completely disorienting.
So I made Lou walk over to a bench so he could explain everything to me. Lou said that the doctor said his prostate was greatly enlarged, and, it was completely covered with a huge layer of benign vascular tissue. The fever indicated that Lou had a slight infection — so they gave him a prescription. (No big deal. Right?)
Lou went on to say that his main doctor said he’d never met a healthier man Lou’s age with such crazy presenting symptoms. But the prostate can be very bloody when it’s greatly enlarged. So the plan was for Lou to undergo a procedure to reduce the size of his prostate. This would un-obstruct Lou’s urethra so he could easily pass urine again, and the surgery should eliminate that horrible urgency problem.
The doctor also said the tests indicated that the blood was coming from the thick layer of vascular tissue covering Lou’s prostate — not his kidneys or bladder — and they would need to remove a sizable amount of this tissue to make the bleeding stop. But, on the plus side, there would be no need to treat Lou for cancer of any kind.
Out of all of this information Lou was dumping on me, I think that was the only piece that I needed to understand!
Lou was scheduled for surgery back up at the University of Minnesota Medical Center in two week’s time, but for now, he was instructed to get a lot of rest, and stay out of the car for extended periods of time. For now, Lou’s catheter had been removed, but the doctor said if the urgency got to be too much, Lou would need to have one put back in. The doctor felt like the catheter was causing the blood clots to be more problematic at that time, so Lou would just need to stay hydrated, and maybe take some iron supplements to keep up his strength.
At that time, the blood and the number of clots was certainly a concern, but bleeding was something to be expected with that much vascular tissue, Lou was told. The only real worry was potential bladder or kidney damage because of the prostate obstruction, so Lou would need to keep an eye on that.
But for now, Lou was a new man!
Dave and Judy looked as stunned as I’m sure I looked. It just didn’t make sense for Lou to go from being on his deathbed the night before, to tap dancing in front of me the next day. I wanted to believe this news, but I didn’t get to hear it with my own ears. I didn’t get to ask any questions, or process the doctor’s findings with my own listening. But seeing Lou at that moment — feeling relieved and like this whole nightmare would soon be ending for him — was a good thing. Right?
But there was almost no time to celebrate or process any further. Brice had just texted me that it was urgent that I call him whenever I could.
So Lou dialed up Brice to thank him, and to personally give him the excellent news. Brice was obviously very happy, but he had another problem he was trying to solve. The rental car company was not cooperating. They needed their SUV back immediately, and they were running out of grace for our situation.
Brice explained that he tried everything he could think of — including hiring a guy to drive the rental down to Tampa for us. But the problem was, the manager said that one of the contracted renters had to be present to close out the contract. There was a huge database of information about our rental agreement, and at this point, the manager needed to actually close out the account with Lou or me in person.
So Lou and Brice decided that I needed to get back on the airplane and fly back to Knoxville as soon as possible. Brice was on his computer checking the flights, and he told Lou if I hurried, I could catch a flight that was leaving in 45 minutes. It wasn’t a direct flight this time, so I’d get in pretty late, but it would work if I hurried. It was a crazy turn of events, but there was no time for me to have any feelings about the situation. I had to get going.
Brice did manage to convince the rental car company to give me until noon the next day to finally turn in the car — with a hefty penalty of course. So that meant I’d need to get back to Knoxville as soon as I could so I could get a minute or two of sleep, and then, I’d need to hit the road at first light to pull it all off.
So Lou kissed me long and hard before he shoved me into another cab. He told me how much he loved me, and that I was his saving grace.
That’s me. Grace under pressure.
My hair was in a terrible knot of tangles on top of my head, and I was wearing a pair of dirty jeans and a wrinkled T-shirt. My eyes felt like two cherry bombs, and I needed to brush my teeth so badly. But grace was the only thing holding me together at that moment. Grace, love, and amazingly good people like Brice, Debbie, Judy and Dave.
Thirty minutes later, I was in a hurry to board the plane before they shut the boarding door. I barely made it. The flight attendant with the out-of-date beehive hairdo was finishing up her pre-flight duties when I thundered past her galley to find my seat. She looked at me with a surprised expression.
