You know when you meet a little kid that is so much more than just “cute?” And when you’re watching them, you notice that they’re so pure that you feel like you can see right through to their soul?
That’s how I always felt about my cousin, Taylor.
He’s a grown man now, and the fact is, I haven’t actually seen him in probably 20 years! That’s really horrible, I know… When my mother died, I feel like my life and the lives of her family members got a little lost in the shuffle. And, my personal dramas with The Imposition Tour, and my very weird life, in general, doesn’t help the situation all that much either — which does make me really sad…
But I do know that Taylor is a father now — he has a baby girl, and in the pictures I’ve seen of Taylor, his beautiful wife, and his sweet-as-can-be daughter, they look like a fantastic family. But the pictures also baffle me because time has changed so many things so very much for Taylor… But my memories and fondness for him are forever safe, and they’re not subject to change…
When Taylor was born, I was already a teenager by then, and so the handful of times I got to spend with him are filled with these vivid memories of that sweet face in the header art, and those awesome glasses that made his shockingly-blue eyes and his sparkly personality seem so much larger than they should be at such a young age! I can specifically remember how easy it was to make my little cousin giggle — and it was the best sound because Taylor has this genuine happiness he gifted to me whenever I got to see him.
I’m sure when Taylor reads this post, he’ll be expecting me to mention a certain story he used to tell me, so I won’t. But you still need to know that Taylor was the most adorable young storyteller I’ve ever known! (Thank you, Taylor, for always indulging me with your dramatic skills, and I do hope you teach that story to your daughter! It really needs to stay in the mix of family lore!)
But needless to say, I’m a big fan of my cousin, Taylor.
And no matter how long it’s been since I’ve seen him — or actually even known him — Taylor has never left my heart or my thoughts because he was so deeply kind and awesome to me back during a season of my life where I was probably too self-involved to be able to adequately express my appreciation of him and his natural gifts. I’m not nearly as self-involved as I was in high school, but to this day, my thoughts about Taylor still feel nearly impossible to adequately express, other than to say, he’s uniquely memorable and still so very easy to love and admire.
Some people in life get more than their “fair share” (if there is such a thing) of challenges, and it often makes me wonder how all of that gets sorted out in the grand scheme of things. I do believe that I’m crystal clear on the fact that everyone is going through something, and no one can ever truly know how it feels to be someone else — which sort of levels out some of the wonders in my mind differently at least. But some people — like Taylor — experience a heck of a lot, and the only choice they have is to dig deep and live their struggles out in the open.
Over the years, I’ve realized that big things that happen to me might seem like small things to you, and vice versa, so very often, I know I’ve said the wrong things to people going through a difficult time, or I’ve avoided saying something for fear of being somehow out of line. So for me, it’s not always easy to know how to give the right kind of empathy and concern for others without putting all of my own stuff onto them in the process! So when it comes to Taylor and his challenges, they sometimes seem like way too much, so the only thing I’ve always known to do is pray, pray, and then pray some more.
And when I do that, I never doubt that God is hearing my prayers.
But when I got an update letter from Taylor’s mom — my Aunt Pat — and she said what her blue-eyed boy needs the most right now is encouragement and a rallying spirit to keep his thoughts and energy up, I instantly saw this picture of him in my mind, pulling on his ears and looking into my heart with his sweet, kind, and happy spirit! There really is no one like Taylor, and I’m so thankful he is my family. I have a history with this young man, and it reminds me of who he’s always been, but it also makes me so proud of who I know he is becoming!
So I’m pulling for you, Taylor — and I’m asking my readers to pull for you too! In this life, we rally around all kinds of causes and stories of people we don’t personally know, and I do believe the collective energy we produce can sometimes make all the difference. But to me, Taylor, you will never be a cause or a person I don’t know. You’re a person who God gifted with Light, love, and a steadfast quality in your being that, for me, can only be described one way:
