My only nephew turned 18 today…
I can’t believe it! It feels like just yesterday he was telling me he wasn’t “As
Max Skeel has always been a pretty big deal in my eyes.
My sister announced she was pregnant 15 days before my mother passed away from cancer. I remember being in a hotel room in Colorado, sitting on the bed next to my dad when my sister delivered her news just before my mom delivered her news that she was dying. Seeing my sister with a brand new life growing inside of her, while my mom was preparing us for a reality that was just beyond us was incredibly heady. But I remember thinking that this new baby in our lives was such a gift, and I couldn’t wait to meet him or her.
My mom was such a rock star about how she crossed over, and I’m sure at some point, I’ll have a lot more to say about my mother on this blog. But one of the things my mom confided in me that weekend while my dad was out shopping for maternity clothes with my sister was how much she hoped I would be there for my sister once the baby was born. My mom didn’t have to ask me to do anything I wouldn’t already want to do, but somehow, knowing I was representing both of us in the life of my big sister and this new human being felt like such an honor.
Unfortunately, I don’t get to see Max very often. But that doesn’t matter because the boy has a firm grip on my heart. From the first time I met him, he reminded me so much of my dad, and as he’s grown up, those familiar feelings of connection to him have only grown more specific. Like my dad, Max is a thinker, and you always know there is so much more going on inside of him than he’ll ever let on. My dad had this “True North” quality in his personality in that he was so dependable and good that when you set your compass to him, you could always be certain you’d never get lost.
That’s how I feel about Max.
For the past 15 months, every morning when I wake up, there is a Snapchat waiting for me on my phone from Max. We’ve been on a Snapchat “streak” since Christmas of 2017! I know it probably doesn’t mean anything, but that message alert on my phone honestly makes me so happy! I like to think that in some small way, we both cross each other’s minds at least once a day. There are no profound messages or confidences in those snaps — usually, Max just snaps a picture of the ceiling in his room or the view outside of his car window with a little message that says “Steaks.” I always snap him back right away because I don’t want to ruin the streak, but the next thing I do is say a little prayer for my nephew, and thank God that he’s in this world.
My sister used to tell me that as long as Max had a ball and a stick, he was happy.
And it seems that she was right! Whether he’s playing baseball, hockey, or golf, Max has always been so clutch. Watching him dig into that quiet character of his to achieve so much success as an athlete has always deeply impressed me. He’s uber-competitive with himself and most definitely with his sister! And whenever I’m around Max, I know he’ll never placate me or let up on me just to be sweet. He’s authentic and consistent in how he approaches life, and I hope he has the courage to stay that way as he moves onward into adulthood.
I don’t have any kids of my own, and so Max and his sister, Madeline, are the closest thing I have to “mine” in this world, and I don’t know how to adequately express how lucky that makes me feel… Max has a tiny bit of everyone in our family in him, and I love how he perfectly represents various traits of all of these people that I admire in my life, and who make up “my tribe.” However, Max is totally his own man, and I for one am excited to witness how he decides to step into the next era of his life.
It’s a big day today for those of us who’ve known Max since the beginning. He’s all grown up, and he’s off to college very soon! I know my mom would’ve loved being around that kid so much, and I’m positive he would’ve made her so proud. I guess I know this because I feel pretty darn proud of him, too. Anyway…
